Maps
by Tyzula-Forever
Summary: "When Azula read about the infinite other worlds she wept, because she could not even conquer one." A traditional Tyzula!Redemption fic.
1. Chapter 1

_AN: I'm so rusty at fic that I needed two bottles of WD-40 to move my fingers and type this. I just couldn't resist Tyzula. A forewarning, this is a Tyzula Redemption story with twists and as much unique-ness as I can give it, but it definitely is simply Tyzula Redemption with no other plot and uses many of the common tropes. I just hope I gave it my own spin._

 _It's ALL in Ty Lee's POV._

* * *

 _ **/MAPS/**_

 _ **by Tyzula-Forever**_

* * *

I was talking to a mirror.

Well, talking to myself in a mirror because nobody else was gonna to help. I _definitely_ needed some encouragement, and people around here could use so many lessons in being supportive and loving and colorful and not such constant downers. The problem was that I kind of was agreeing with some of their negativity and I _never_ did that.

I stood up for stuff people really didn't like, which got super exhausting when constantly around _Mai_ , but I did it because there was a bright side to everything. Like, like, this ugly vase I had that my grandma gave me so I had to keep it and keep it up in my room. It was ugly except at one time of day when the light hit it just right. It was beautiful.

So, I was trying my best to think that way about Azula instead of act like everybody else. But. . . they had some really good points.

Did I think Azula was going to see me and suddenly change her mind?

No, I was pretty sure that Azula was going to either attempt to murder me or worse; ignore me completely. But I wasn't going to give anyone the satisfaction of knowing that I agreed with their jerk opinions about Azula.

Zuko had a hero complex. Suki had old scars. Aang was hopeful but him not taking any action was making me want to rip my braid off. Katara and Sokka were super against me even trying to talk to her. Mai again pretended to not even care about Azula which was _ridiculous_ and she would have to give up that act eventually.

They all would because _I_ would prove them wrong. Duh.

"Are you ready?" Zuko asked and I jumped. Oh Agni, he just saw me giving myself a pep talk over bringing my ex-girlfriend lunch. "It's really not as awful as you think. Slightly jarring, I've heard, but she's not like. . . last time you saw her, I guess."

"That's really not so impressive." I shivered, because I never stopped thinking about her, about how hard she fell.

Zuko pointed. "There's lunch. Don't get eaten instead of the food."

 **x**

"Azula," I said softly, inviting myself into the once familiar bedroom. I realized it wasn't a prison; the princess could get out any time she wanted, free herself, burn it all to the ground, kill her brother or mother. But she just stayed inside, dutifully obeying her house arrest. "I brought you lunch."

She didn't say anything. She acted like I was a ghost, like I didn't exist.

I felt awkward when I walked in and searched to set it down. Her room was always bare and empty except for dragons and the softest bed ever, which was still there, but now there were stacks of books and scrolls. It was weird, but she was always really smart. There were a few clothes left on the floor, more books and scrolls.

Maybe she got bored, I guess? I usually found other stuff to do that didn't involve reading.

I waited. I thought about leaving, but before I could start walking towards the door, I asked, "Can you tell me why you don't want to talk to me? I just showed up here after so long and you won't even _look_ at me. I'm happy to see you and you at least owe me a _hello_."

I sounded stupid and I knew it. If she didn't want to talk to me she wouldn't talk to me in order to tell me why.

The princess paused and set down the book I only just noticed. "I owe nothing to anyone. Everyone owes me everything. If I told you or my brother or mother to rip out all of your teeth and give them to me, you should, because your idea of helping me is locking me where I can't embarrass you and visiting to make yourself _feel better_."

I gulped. Yeah, that was bad. She sounded so eloquent when her speech could be summed up to _go fuck yourself_.

"Well, I've never visited," I chirped proudly. Azula did not look impressed.

"I know. I have lost what little respect I had for you. I have _appreciated_ you and Mai staying out of my life, as per my wishes. But I knew that eventually you would try to smile my loathing away and melt my cold, cold heart."

"I wanna help you."

"You'll give up. Everyone always does. You know why? Because I wanted them to give up," Azula said with that same intoxicating beauty.

She was not so beautiful anymore, even if her words were just as gorgeous as they always had been. I wanted not to notice how unattractive I found her right now really bad. But I did. Azula seemed to have given up on herself as much as everybody else gave up on her.

"I'm not gonna give up," I whispered, and I wished that my voice had been louder. "So … there are a lot of books in here. You never had a lot of books."

"They are my last refuge."

That sounded unpleasant, but I smiled at her. I was pretty sure she could see right through it.

"Oh." She didn't have anything else for me to comment on. "It's good you have a hobby!"

"I need something to keep me company as I slowly die here."

That sounded more unpleasant, but I kept smiling at her.

"Well… I have to go." She didn't argue when I left.

I didn't expect her to.

 **x**

The minute I was with Zuko, it all just spilled out like fire gummies from a bag or something.

"I'm _horrified_ of your sister!"

"Join the club."

"Shh! I'm horrified _for_ your sister. She's not her. It's like someone just snatched her corpse and decide to live in it."

"That's an image I didn't need."

"She needs someone to save her."

"I think she would disagree."

"I'll force her to be saved."

"She'll rip her own arms open."

"Not my arms?"'

"Hers. Much more frightening."

"Does she want to leave the palace?"

"She can't leave the palace and it's not like she's asked. I think she has said two words to me since I rescued her and took full responsibility for her house arrest."

"Does she need someone to look after her?"

"Do you remember when I told you about her ripping her arms open?"

" _Really_. I mean, she just lies in the darkness with books."

"Ty Lee," Zuko said, grabbing my arms to steady me. I think I was about to topple over. "Stop trying to find an excuse to stay. Everybody does when they see her."

"She said something about that."

"That they always give up? Yeah, I know. Because they do. Only my mother and I stuck around. Even Katara did her time trying to atone because she felt bad about the horrible mental descent. I understand why you would. Just like I understood why you wouldn't come back here despite being so hung up on her for years."

"I was wondering if you'd like to hire me," I said and I wanted to be sweet, but I choked on the words too much. "What? I think she might take me a little more seriously if she knows I'm here to stay. If everybody else walked out so fast, after all…"

Zuko looked confused by that and I guess I could see why. I had the most perfect life in the world, and doing mercenary work like this was really different from the Kyoshi Warriors and everything they had given me.

"The Kyoshi Warriors, though. That's your everything."

"They gave me a second chance." I wrung my hands and avoided looking at him. "And it was awesome! But … well, my mom used to say to pay things forward. I want to give her a second chance." I think I wanted to _get_ one with Azula too, but I wasn't sure yet about that. It was too confusing right now. I knew I was just like Zuko said and that I felt bad because _I was directly responsible_. Mai had been telling me for years that I wasn't, that anyone would do it, but I blamed myself from the moment I found out what happened to her.

It was time to fix that ache that never quite went away. A hole inside of me that was just her size.

Zuko couldn't resist my offer, just like I expected. It almost made me laugh out loud instead of just in my head, because I was thinking about Azula and Mai and me and how we used to mess with him. He was a jerk, but kind of a good sport about it sometimes. Mostly a jerk, though.

"You want to keep her from losing it? Or at least, that's the work you're asking for, because it's _a lot_ , and I'm pretty sure she hasn't forgiven you from the scene in there."

"She needs somebody. I can be that somebody. I've always seen it in her, I've always seen the girl who just needs some love to take that twistedness away."

Zuko swallowed and I could see he didn't agree with me. But he still said, "Yeah. Yeah, you can try. Maybe she _will_ be more responsive to someone she, uh, dated. She might still be into you."

That really wasn't what I was going for, but I smiled, because however Zuko let me do it was a good reason for him to let me do it.

"She seems kind of content being left alone," Zuko said and I sighed.

"She can't be content! Have you seen her? She looks scary!"

"Well, she's always looked scary to me…" Zuko trailed off.

"I want to make her…" _Azula again_.

I missed her for so long. I never stopped thinking about her. I never got over her.

But when she turned up, I couldn't bear to face her.

This was about me. It had nothing to do with healing Azula, and everything to do with healing myself.

I always knew I was selfish, and so that realization wasn't so surprising.


	2. Chapter 2

I didn't know where to start.

Nobody would know where to start with Azula. I mean, I _should_ because I was her best friend and believed in her, but what I saw wasn't too encouraging. She was a _wreck_ and that really scared me. Seeing her like that made me avoid facing her again, which was not the best move for someone who wanted to _heal_ the princess.

The terrifying princess who apparently even Katara tried to help, to no avail.

I was _different_ though. Azula and I had a relationship that was so special. She couldn't have forgotten that, forgotten us. If I could make her remember why she gave me all her attention, her affection sometimes even if it wasn't how most people are affectionate, I could make her take steps towards not just waiting to die in her bedroom.

Last night, I had tossed and turned with the image of her in my mind. She was compared to her old self; the self I was…

No. I had to totally stop thinking about attractiveness. This wasn't about sleeping with her or even kissing her. It was about atoning for what I did. I was _not going to think about how she used to be sexy but wasn't anymore_.

When I woke up, I went to go see her again. This time I braced myself better, and I didn't need a pep talk in the mirror. They expected me to serve her breakfast. I plotted to serve breakfast her. No, that completely didn't make sense. Whatever. The point was that I was going to get her out of her room.

I grabbed the tray, walked past her room and went to start setting up the patio in the wing of the palace she had somehow claimed despite not leaving her bedroom. It was very empty, but well cleaned. Spotless, which gave me hope that people had hope for her.

There. Sunny, but out of the open and the bugs. It was hot out, a nice dry summer. I missed those a lot.

I walked back to her room and knocked.

"Come to breakfast," I said, but I squeaked it. Yeah, ordering Azula around felt very wrong and I could barely get the words out of my tightened throat. "Please, if you want, I made a really beautiful breakfast for you and there will be no Zuko or your mother or anything. You don't even have to eat with me."

I was planning on being patient, but I quickly lost it and pushed open the door. She was pretending to be asleep, which made me cross my arms. I opened my mouth to tell her off like I would anyone else, but it didn't happen. I couldn't force that out.

Did other people have that problem? Did other people still feel like her slave even if she was the weaker one now? I hoped so, because I felt _humiliated_ by it.

"I am clearly sleeping," Azula said in a soft tone that would scare a lion-bear.

I frowned and then quickly stopped. I couldn't let myself be negative because I bet that it was why everybody else had lost the battle with Azula. They let negativity ruin them and I was the complete opposite of negative.

"Please," I asked and she didn't respond. "I'm trying to do nice stuff for you."

"In order to alleviate your own guilt."

"I'm not guilty!" I lied loudly and she shook her head without bothering to open her eyes. "Fine. I'm a little guilty. But I'm not doing this because I pity you or something; I'm doing it because I love you or something."

Azula sighed carelessly. "You sound like my mother. I don't like it when people sound like my mother."

I knew what I had to do and say but I totally didn't want to. But I did. Ugh, I did.

"I'll do whatever you want," I forced myself to say.

She opened her eyes solely to roll them. "You don't mean that, and I know it. You have no idea what I want you to do and I am certain you are hoping I want to have breakfast with you, when, I could just want to tell you to walk waist deep in water and then—"

"Hit me with lightning, I know. You don't have to be so dramatic," I grumbled shrilly before taking in a huge breath. Positivity was hard right now, but if I didn't do all I could, I would never be able to forgive myself. Worse than before. "What if we play a game? You ask me to do something, I do it, I ask you to do something—"

Azula yawned.

"That sounds like a boring game. You have no imagination. If you want to know what I want, it is for you to leave and stay out of my life. If you loved me, you would respect my wishes."

I sighed and hissed and cleared my throat before stating as sternly as I could, "No. I'm not playing this. I bet everybody tried to get you out of bed first. And you make it more and more hard for people because you figure out what they all do to try to get you to leave your room and do something like go for a walk, or have breakfast."

"Surprisingly astute. Yes, getting me out of bed to go soak up the sunshine is quite cliché at this point." She stood up, balancing one hand on a stack of books, and I took two steps backwards from fright. "What? I've realized that I will have to be more creative to defeat you due to the fact that you are obsessed with me and irrevocably in love with me."

I fought my expression of disbelief and anger over her accusing me of being as dumb as I was at fourteen. I couldn't be mad at her, because she was Azula and she was terrible, broken or whole. She had left her room and I knew she had some ulterior motive behind it. Azula had something to _gain_ that definitely wasn't my trust or affection, and it gave me goosebumps.

But I got up and followed her to the sun-drenched patio. I would play her game, even if I was sure it wasn't a pretty one. She had broken everybody who tried to put her back together and she knew all the tricks, but I wasn't everybody. I _could_ do it.

Because I had played a lot of games with Azula in my lifetime.


	3. Chapter 3

I chewed on my lip until it bled while I watched Azula examine the breakfast I had laid out.

She ran her fingernail along the table, studied every piece of food from afar. Azula looked up and smirked at me.

"Well done. I will humor you. Just because I think you're pretty," Azula said slickly and I fought back an uncomfortable grimace.

At least she sat down.

I thought the sunlight would restore her glow, but she was a vestige of a great beauty and I felt bad for thinking about that. I wanted to give her a—

 _Makeover_. Okay, Azula was used to people trying to make her better or whatever, but I doubted that anybody had tried to give her a _makeover_. And I knew that Azula just wanted me to do something different than everybody else did.

I smiled and silently sat down across from her.

Azula looked at me, watched me. When I felt the heat of her gaze, I remembered seeing cages with the dangerous animals at the circus. I always stayed away from them because they scared me so much, but when I had to walk past them, sometimes they looked at me just like that.

"What's your next step for fixing your poor, broken ex-girlfriend?" Azula inquired as she poked at the food in search of something I didn't know. "What now? Will I be impressed?"

"I want to give you a make-over," I said and I enjoyed the expression on her face. She poked an orange too hard and it gently burst in juice that was barely visible.

"That _is_ new. I think I should be honest about that," Azula said, her shock fading quickly. She still seemed to have the upper hand. She still had control and it made me so very uncomfortable.

I didn't know why I agreed to this. I also didn't know why I had offered for her to be in control, because I should have known she would exercise it beyond the point of kindness. She had no kindness. She had no heart. She had nothing to lose, and there's nothing more dangerous than a person who has nothing to lose.

"We could do it after breakfast. It'll be fun." I glowed and smiled, and I hoped that was good enough. "Really fun!"

She looked at me as if she pitied me. That, I thought, should be the other way around. Maybe I looked ridiculous, I guessed, looked pathetic compared to the other people who came before me. But I was more than willing to look weak in her eyes if it meant I got several steps ahead of the competition.

The failed competition. I wondered how many people had just lost it trying to heal and help her. I assumed even _Aang_ had, which was a daunting thought. If he gave up on Azula, what was I going to do? My only defining factor was having kissed her a few times, and I was beginning to think that believing that was enough was a mistake.

"I'll do it," Azula said after making me sweat. Which really wasn't fair of her, but she had never played fair before. "It should be interesting."

"Yup."

Interesting was a pretty good word for this entire experience.

* * *

When I walked into Azula's room for the make-over, tripping over books as I entered what amounted to a library with bedroom furniture in it, she was wearing nothing but a short, dragon-embroidered silk robe, as if that was supposed to make me break like a hormonal teenager or scuzzy old guy.

I was better than that by now; I had a mind of steel and was set on doing my job properly. It was a grasp at control, but petty, childish. If she thought she could hypnotize me or throw me off or make me falter, she thought wrong.

But I was going to play by her rules. That was my take on the challenge; she could have all the control she wanted, until she got too comfortable. I had nothing to lose, and there is nothing more dangerous than someone with nothing to lose.

I did not give a damn about dignity.

"You're already started. Great!" I said brightly and her face flickered with discontent before she regained composure. Azula had never shown that before, shown that weakness. She never telegraphed her moves in a fight or in conversation, but she was apparently rusty.

"What do you have in mind?" she asked and the affected breathiness of her voice was, admittedly, kind of sexy.

But, despite her attempts at sexual coercion, I had my head screwed on straight and I focused my bright eyes on her molten ones. She clearly didn't like the eye contact judging by her chewing on the side of her cheek, but she cared too much about power to be the one to avert her eyes. Just like those dangerous animals at the circus.

It was on. Azula could be a seductress with complete ease, but I could be as cute as a kitty with complete ease.

"I was thinking I'd do your hair first - oh, no, flowery bath first! - and then we need to do something about your dry skin, and then totally your make-up." I grinned and hoped she had not caught on to the fact that I had grown up and matured while she had regressed.

It worked. Just like it worked on everybody. That sweet, bubbly girl could not pose a threat, was a ridiculous general consensus. Azula was not immune... kind of like I was not wholly immune to the entire sexy act. I used to want her bad. I used to want her more than anything in the world. But now I could handle it. I could! I had some relationships, some experience, some dedication to my job as a warrior.

But my confidence shattered when she said, "Fine. Let's have a little bath then." She had that glint in her eyes. She had reclaimed the power in the room and I tried to look like I didn't notice.

Okay, I regretted saying that. Did she need to start with that before I could do her nails and make her prettier than ever before? Yes. But I should have expected that the first thing she would suggest would be nudity. Like duh.

I played into her hands and I had to play out without her noticing.

Azula was right; this _would_ be interesting.

* * *

"Do you not have servants?" I asked sweetly as I kicked a golden cupboard.

I was in a really beautiful room with a really beautiful girl who was naked but submerged in water I tried not to look at.

This entertained her.

"I have books," Azula replied.

I kind of saw that as my opportunity to ask, "I knew you were like the smartest person on the planet, but you never were into that stuff."

"I think I would have been into it if I didn't have a father obsessed with using his beloved daughter to conquer the world," Azula said.

"Oh! Well, it's nice you have hobbies," I said brightly as I continued trying to locate nail paint and files. She really needed a freaking prep team because I was good at maybe brushing her hair for her or something, and experimenting with make-up when they were kids, but not this.

Experimenting with making out when they were kids. I pushed that dangerous thought away and left Azula to go find the stuff I needed needed.

Leaving the misty room was the best feeling in the world. It was not only the cool, comfortable air, but also being away from a woman who was trying to seduce me. Very heavily. I was pretty sure that it would work on anyone who didn't remember Azula burning her cinnamon ice in revenge when it fell on the ground or Azula coloring pictures of dead pe— _Agni_ , she was a fucked up kid, I realized for the first time. I probably should have noticed that a long time ago.

I walked into the dangerous depths of the palace and hoped for the best.

* * *

"… and bangs!" I cheered as I finished a job that was really hard when my hands kept shaking. She _saw_ me trembling, which was the worst part. "Did you do the lipstick."

"I think you should." She held it up to my lips and I really thought about smashing her face into the mirror. But I cared too much about doing this work right.

"I'm not kissing lipstick onto you."

"I thought you said you were going to do whatever I said. You've done it before."

"You've been trying to seduce me for like four hours. I'm not breaking. Even though you look super hot now!" I smiled and examined myself in the mirror. Looking good.

"I do. Because I look _super hot now_ ," she said sarcastically, "I will allow you to continue playing. You may try again to turn me good tomorrow."

I figured that was better than nothing, right?

"Sounds good!" I said. I smiled, didn't say a word about how I wasn't trying to turn her good, and left her.

Zuko was in the hall.

"I heard her. You've gotten pretty far," Zuko said and I smiled at him.

"Don't underestimate the power of optimism," I chirped.

I bat my eyelashes and left to go scream into a pillow for several hours.


	4. Chapter 4

In the late evening, I was on my knees with Azula's hands loosely in mine. She insisted on the kneeling; I insisted on the apologizing first. Today could not have gone more awry, and I would blame Azula for most of the problems if they were not actually my fault this time.

She was not perfect, but I was far from perfect too.

So, I was on my knees, trying to explain to her that I wished I could take what I did back.

"I never meant the things I said," I humbly whispered. I tried my best to be truly apologetic, because I really, really _was_ sorry.

I didn't know that Azula _could_ cry until right now. At least, except at the times she had lost it, but I really had avoided her at that time. Of course, the princess hid it at all costs, but I discovered what I had done and my stomach twisted with remorse for hours and hours.

"Of course you did. You have no grasp on manners," Azula icily replied, playing powerful, and I played along. It was her game, after all.

 _We first fall in love on the beach. There were feelings before that, maybe even long before that, but this was the moment that I knew I was so in love with her._

 _The two of us were on the sand. I was drenched and it stuck to my swimsuit, which I had noticed she didn't really take her eyes off of, but I wasn't going to ask. I thought maybe she was just uncomfortable with anyone giving me attention but her._

 _But was that romance or was that crazy?_

 _I've never been an expert at words or anything. I was drawing in the sand and she faked disinterest, studying her nails. I wished she was looking, but it was more for my benefit. I hated silence, and we were alone together late at night with not much to say._

 _I've also never been an expert at drawing. I made a star, a cute little smiley face, another cute little smiley face, another cute little smiley face, and then a heart._

 _My heart was racing faster than it ever had before._

 _I saw it as a chance to do more than hint, stare and wait. Azula was risky, of course, but I was a risk-taking type of person. It was really my idea of the most romantic thing ever at the time; I scratched our names into the sand._

 _"What is that?" Azula asked, proving she_ had _been watching me the whole entire time._

 _"Oh, I think these things are so cute when people do stuff like this and they're cuter carved into trees but sand is nice too!" I babbled through a bright, wide smile. The shadows of the night made it completely impossible to read her expression, and the stark moonlight made her look sinster. More sinister than usual, at least._

 _"You are supposed to do those for your romantic interest," Azula said, and I knew I was doomed. I shouldn't have done that. I shouldn't have done that._

 _"What if I told you that you were – or that I was – that I_ am _interested in you? What would you say? I mean, not to demand it, of course, princess. I l – you're a good awesome friend – we can just stay friends. Best friends—"_

 _"Be quiet. You're giving me a headache," Azula ordered. There was something different about her voice, but I was too overwhelmed to think about it. "You are. . . interested in me?"_

 _"Yes," I dared to say, still smiling from fear._

 _"Oh." Azula looked like there was a war going on behind her eyes. "The feeling is mutual."_

 _That was clearly hard for her to say, and I couldn't be more overjoyed._

 _"So, you're interested in me? Because I'm in love with you," I said, my voice much too high-pitched._

 _She could not say those words back to me, I knew. I stared at her lips, even though I learned last night that Azula was not the most romantically adept person._

 _But she got the hint._

 _She kissed me._

Years after, Azula and I had broken each other's hearts one too many times to maintain those feelings. I did not know if we would ever feel the same way again. We were younger. Everything was less complicated.

"Do you remember when we wrote out names in the sand and—" I couldn't finish because Azula scoffed and acted like it was an annoyance.

I could not have done this so easily – upset her like that. I knew she was unstable but Azula always found a way to push me out when all I wanted was _in_. I wanted Azula to open up to me, but neither of us had any plans to do anything about it. It seemed hopeless.

"You came close. I will give you that," Azula said, feigned sympathy in her golden eyes. They were so pretty that I could get lost in them, but now they just made me angry.

I frowned, then realized I was frowning and stopped. I wished that this would be easier.

"I don't know why you're even still talking to me. Don't you kick most people out by now?" I whispered. Azula smirked.

"Your apologies entertain me, I have to say," Azula remarked as she combed her hair with her fingers. "Maybe I'll let you stay if…."

"If?" I breathlessly asked. Oh, I should not be giving her this kind of power. But I needed to lose to win in this case.

"If you beg," Azula said, and I should have expected it. There was an evil smirk on her lips and I fought super hard not to roll my eyes and walk away.

I held back a sigh and took Azula's hands in mine. My knees were sore at this point, but I forced myself to stay kneeling. I held onto Azula's clammy mitts with my sticky paws and I was startled that she did not pull away.

"Please let me stay another day. I'm sorry that I invaded – tried to invade – your walls too fast. I…" I did not say the three words I was thinking.

Azula did not deserve my love. Not yet, at least.


End file.
